Imagine a world without Eddie McGuire – from Eddie Everywhere to Eddie Nowhere. Even John Lennon would admit “it’s easy if you try”. No boofhead antics as a badge of pride, no more using sport as the be-all and end-all of defining a person’s identity and no more offensive comments! Sometimes I think McGuire must have a fetish to always have a foot to put in his mouth whenever he speaks. From calling Western Sydney the “land of the falafel” (which must make his own neighbourhood of Toorak the “land of the lost”) to claiming men’s figure skating is “a bit of broke back” because the competitors happened to be men who skate, and by Eddie’s thinking obviously must be gay (which makes me think what would Brian Boitano do?) it’s time to give Eddie the shove.
Last Saturday night, Sydney Swans played Collingwood Magpies (for whom McGuire is club president) at the MCG and a 13-year old Collingwood fan was removed from the stadium for calling Sydney’s Adam Goodes an “ape” because he’s Aboriginal. Goodes has shown what a guy he is by not pressing charges, despite a mealy-mouthed apology from the girl who claimed that she didn’t know calling someone an “ape” could be racist. Eddie McGuire was also praised for being the first to apologise on behalf of Collingwood and facilitating a personal apology to Goodes from the girl.
But of course McGuire had to swallow both his size-10s again this morning. As omnipresent Eddie Everywhere – not just appearing on television and in the papers but radio too – talking with his co-host (and former footballer) Luke Darcy about the King Kong musical, McGuire said: “Get Adam Goodes down for it, do you reckon?”
Oh, good one Eddie. Sadly I can see how you’ve tried to make a “joke” there but instead became one yourself. Since Adam Goodes was called an “ape”, and King Kong is about a “gorilla” – there must be less than a millimetre between the dots joined in Eddie’s brain.
Eddie McGuire would have to one of the biggest hypocrites around, after yesterday claiming “you can’t discriminate about discrimination”.
How many more times can Eddie McGuire make an offensive comment and laugh it off as being a “bloke”? To give McGuire a taste of his own medicine, why don’t we tell him the most offensive jokes about his beloved Collingwood that we know? I’ll start with my personal favourite: “What did one truckie say to the other? Get out of Millane!” Not to mention the dozen or more rumours I’ve heard about dear Eddie over the years. Of course I’m skirting defamation here, so I’ll give you three clues: 1) Wife 2) Next room 3) Fill-in-the-blank yourself!
If sport is supposed to be the great social cohesive, where contrary to cliche they play the ball and not the man, then we haven’t learnt anything from Nicky Winmar taking a stand against racial abuse 20 years ago, the impetus for the AFL’s annual Indigenous All Stars round.
In a perfect world, Eddie McGuire would be nowhere.
UPDATE:
McGuire has again proven himself to be an ardent hypocrite:
How many hours until McGuire starts with the “I’m not racist but …” schtick? Taking all bets!
I Knew I Was Right – Eddie McGuire, omnipresent hypocrite
The Josh Holley 